Tuesday, December 28, 2010


The Heartburn That Kept Me From Going

The next day I heard on the news that the plane had motor troubles. It crash landed inside the bermuda triangle. Not the resort, but the abysmal trap. The same area where Amelia Earhart lost her wallet and her soul. It's not reported if there were any survivors.

I never can doubt pain. Not after news like that. Heartburn will never be a nuisance again.
What had happened was I ate too many spicy peppers. I was sitting at lunch with my lovely mistress. She was taunting me for not being a man, for not telling my wife about her. I told her I'm more like a wildebeest and she thought I was more like a cockroach. I huffed out a lump of air and grabbed my balls, I said to her "Only a man can eat these peppers".
"Oh, please" she said "We both know you take prilosec."

I do, guys. I do have a bad case of acid reflux disease. But this was the only known heroism I could pull in a posh restaurant only celebs go to.

To retort, I mention to her, "Well, you're not as pretty as you think".
She tells me, "Listen here fatman, eat them peppers and I'll walk out of this restaurant".
She gave me a serious look and I gave her a smile.

I love her very much, so much. The plane I needed to catch didn't seem very necessary to board. My wife's calls went straight to voicemail. She was waiting for me. It was her plane to catch.

"Tell your wife about me." she said.
instead, I gobbled down the peppers and in 10 minutes I was in hell.
"Well, this is great. I'm leaving" she says.
Leave, leave I don't care." I said as I cringed with knives through my heart.
The plane I needed to catch still didn't seem very necessary to board.
They say, a person can't be in love if he's got a toothache. Well fuck that shit!
I'm left without the two important women in of my life.

Monday, December 27, 2010


Never Be Late

You stumble out of a bar and walk along the sidewalk, knowing where you will go. You look down to your watch and tap it once, drunkenly walking down the sidewalk toward the darkness of the night and faint pink tone that covers it.

You walk and walk through trees, grass and snow until you arrive at the train tracks.
You look around to see if anyone arrived. then you look down at the watch and tap it once.
You decide to sit down in the snow. As time passes you lay down in the snow. You tilt your head toward the arm with the watch and you take a look. Again you tap the watch only one time. You move your head to the left, to the right, looking if someone arrived. Who could it be? You look up to the moon. It feels like words want to come out of your mouth. But they don't.

You nap. Just a quick one but long enough to catch the break of day. As you wake up to the break of day, you stand up tall and stare towards the crack between night and morning. You look at the light seeping through.

The sun has come up. You smile at the sight of the sun. You look down to your watch and tap it three times, still smiling. The sun becomes too bright, You shield your face with your hand. You turn your back to the sun and put your hands into your pockets. You kick a rock on the ground. Then another rock gets kicked out of the way. You pause for a moment.

At last, all we can see is the blue sky.

You think, "I arrived so I could remember something, but
The only thing on my mind was a remark my friend made. She asked me if I ever wanted to scream at the moon."

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

PLUG (Alice Lancaster's blog)

GO HERE IF YOU ARE BORED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PLUG (Kristie Muller)


she recently moved out here to new york and i havent even gotten to hang out with her.
here's her blog and it has a bunch more photos there that you wont see on her flickr.

but here is some (of my favs) of her photos!!!

 i went over board again but i really love her images. there's something very subtlely attractive about these photos that everytime i come back to them i say "ahhhhh, oh right..."


i'm at home in crown point. it's been a few days of break but i want to go back to school already. i've started to realize the only thing i can stand talking about with people around me (in new york) is theatre. it makes sense though. i've had troubles with getting more writings done. but i have been watching movies on netflix that i "should" have seen already, because it's easier. i mailed my stuff out to my friends! see, i'm just a little slow. i might have some new things to show you soon. right now i'm waiting to go to arizona to enjoy warmer weather and to finally skate a little bit before heading back to new york. see you soon.

Friday, December 3, 2010



GIRL and BOY are sitting at a table with food on their plates. They are eating.

GIRL: I want to stay here. I think I have a calling.
BOY: Well, I’m not sure what to do. Did you ever think about leaving?
G: No, I’m staying put, I’m staying here.
B: Right, but still, have you ever thought of going someplace else?
G: Where?
B: But have you ever thought-
G: I don’t know.
B: are you so sure you want to stay?
B: Come with me to Portugal.
G: uh, no… I don’t think so.
B: Why not?
G: Can I tell you a something?
B: Yes.
G: I was walking upstairs from the subway earlier today, when it hit me. I had a revelation. I was walking upstairs while everyone was walking downstairs. I was on the right hand side but people were in my way. It didn’t seem like I was in their’s… people were walking down on both sides of the staircase. I felt like I was in the way. But why? Do you understand?
B: I’m not sure I do.
G: See, this is what I mean.
B: What?
G: You don’t understand.
B: That’s where you’re wrong. I do understand. Us, both of us, aren’t from here. Things are confusing-
G: There’s the question of what is right. Was I wrong?
B: No. You are confused and so am I. You see, this is why I like you.
G: You relate to me?
B: I see your pain. I do! Don’t you feel alone?
G: How can you feel alone when there are 8 million people around you?
B: That’s not my point. No. Listen to me. I want to help you. Come with me to Portugal.
G: I have no calling there.
B: How are you so sure?
G: What is this? Do you love me?
B: I don’t know. But I feel your pain. I relate to you. I think we need to stick together. Because I’ve already smelt your perfume. I’ve tasted it in my mouth.
G: What are you saying?
B: I want to help you. I want to be here for you. I can see that you need help.
G: I don’t really. (smiles)
B: Then why haven’t you left?
G: Do you want me to?
B: I don’t know you very well.
G: I don’t know you as well.
B: Well, tell me about it. Will you?
G: No. I’d like to keep it to myself.
B: Ah Shit! You’re not making this any easier.
G: Why do you think I need help?! Stop thinking because I’m a girl in the city I need some man’s help.
G: Why are we even here? Why has it come to this?
B: we’re straying away from details.
G: (laughs) What’s so funny.
B: I’m not smiling.
G: I want to breathe.
B: I want to help you.
G: Stalemate.
B: I should go. You’re not doing me any good.
G: Wait a moment. Will you wait a moment?
B: I want to help you.
G: I don’t take hand outs.
B: What is the meaning of this?
G: You’re not going anywhere, I know it.
B stands.
B: I want to sit back down, but I will only if I hear you say so.
B: You’re breaking my heart.
B starts walking away.
G: You’re not leaving me are you? You’re NOT leaving me!
GIRL holds a plate of food in her hands. She stands up. All the contents in the plate run off the plate and onto the ground.
B: I’m going for a smoke…

Monday, November 29, 2010


here is some dialogue i wrote for a couple of very short shorts.


A: A person is the nicest right before bed and right when they wake up.
B: Huh?
A: Dreaming is so fun. I’m right.
B: You’re right.
A: How wonderful is it to enter the dream state. It’s joyful. To enter the dream state and to leave the dream state.
B: And?
A: It’s like leaving the theatre after a good play or good movie.
B: I assume entering one you like?
A: You’re right.
B: I’m right.
A: Only at this moment of time, if they didn’t have anything else to worry about, they are very kind at heart.
B: I asked her to come back to me twice.
A: And what did she say?
B: She said no twice.
A: you didn’t give it another go?
B: Three times?
A: Yes a third time.
B: How could I?
A: (Interrupts on “I”) Easy.
B: I went home after a days of work. I was filthy…
A: What you say to her?
B: I went to the bathroom and turned the knob of the hot and cold water…
A: What you say to her?
B: Settled down in my tub in a nice bath.
A: Ey!
B: I just sat there soaking in my own dirt…
A: What did you say to her?
B: I’m sitting in my own filth…
A: You don’t say that to her!
B: What are you talking about?
A: You told her how you felt? How you felt? You’re ridiculous!
B: “You are a very pretty man.”
A: Thank you, I know.
B: No. She said I was a very pretty man.
A: Well I appreciate it.
B: “You are a very pretty man. May I touch your hair? It is perfect.”
A: Well, if you touch my hair it wouldn’t be perfect anymore.
B: That’s what I told her.
A: Well alright. You didn’t do anything wrong then.

We Are So Lucky

 A: Are we going home?
B: It’s really nice outside you know.
A: Are you going home?
B: Yes.
A: Far far far…
B: What?
A: somewhere far, far, far away.
B: Honey, don’t be silly!
A: Geese are silly, I have dignity.
A: Are we going home?
B: We’ll have to see.
A: Why did you give the young woman money?
B: Which young woman?
A: Before the stairs…
B: Hm?
A: With the baby girl…
B: Mm.
A: She was panhandling.
B: Dear, I had to give her money.
A: you know she’s panhandling you.
B: quiet.
A: she’s stealing from you.
B: quiet now.
A: I saw her at a station half way across the city.
B: Why do you hate me?
A: I Don’t hate you.
B: Because your head is on my shoulder.
A: Because I love you!
B: We are so lucky!
A: Home is where we will go.
B: We’ll have to see.
A: I want to help people.
B: You don’t have time. We have to get you straightened up.
B: When you’re in trouble you can’t think of anything else.
A: Oh no…
B: (to herself) “A person can’t be in love if he has got a toothache.”
A: Oh.
B: Nothing! Nothing! Nothing else!
A: will we ever be alright again?
B: will we ever be fine again?
A: Yes, we will. We will be fine!
A: (sings) “This is a man’s world. This is a man’s world. But it wouldn’t be nothing, nothing without a woman or girl”
B: (interrupts on “girl”) That’s not my favorite song.
A: I’m sorry I went off earlier.
B: It’s ok.
A: Listen to me. I’m sorry.
B: I understand now.
A: I went insane.
B: be quiet now. I’m telling you. We have a long time to go.
A: Happy birthday to me. Happy birthday to me. (sings) “Happy birthday my dearest. Happy birthday to me.”

Friday, November 26, 2010


"i love ryan so much forever now"

haunting and funny.


watched the 1997 version of lolita

this is a screen test of dominique swain as "lo"

she makes jeremy irons drop a line!!!!!!


I'VE BEEN FUCKING UP! haven't really been updating this blog. been busy with scene work and school. i'm sure i'll bring some writings up here pretty soon. i have a very very short film i'm about to shoot that i wrote. also i am having auditions to one of my other short films. shit be rollin'. anyway, i got some new mail from my friend tubbs!

one of my fav tubbs fotos



"dude, your bachelor party was tight!"

THANK YOU TUBBS!!! i'm a shitty friend, i havent even mailed anything of mine out yet. sean, tj, tubbs, i'm mailing shit out tomorrow. I PROMISE!!!!! so look out for some stuff in the mail.

cool. more shit to be up. i got some time on my hands right now.

Saturday, November 20, 2010

PLUG (Inga Jug)

this plug is long overdue. i've always liked this girl's images. she's also very diverse in medium and content. god i just love these images!!!!

here's her flickr

yeah i kinda went overboard with showing you her images but i really can't help it.

it's strange, they all got a child like curiousity to them. it's about who you know and where you've been with them.

well, enough is enough. enjoy these!!!!!

Monday, November 15, 2010



Sunday, November 14, 2010




Ben-"her", Done That

My most favorite women are the ones who don’t respond
We once had history but for the better of my health
they know
what to do.
“stay away from me, I’ll rip your heart out” they say.
well I’m far away...
I do miss her.
And her.
And her.
And her.
And her.
And her.


Hopeful Wishings

you want and you want,
But don't have,
you can't give.


sean to me
me to sean


sean to me
me to sean


sean to me

me to sean

Wednesday, November 3, 2010


busy with school. writings are coming in very slow. but i have a few things for you. always trust that i'll be putting up "sean's great idea" up. if you haven't checked; "sean's great idea" is an attempt for me and my friend sean (who lives in texas) to keep in touch with each other with pictures. we send each other photo text of a photo taken that day for every single day. so far so good. check his blog too for the actual posts! i'm just copying and pasting his posts! he's also got other stuff on there so check it out!

sean's blog

also me and my friend taylor have a tumblr and we are 320 posts in. JESUS. check it out for some quick inspirations or smiles. peep it


i've gotten a few things in the mail and i hope to get back to those folks asap! also trying to start up another short film. haven't finished editing a previous so i will find more time for that stuff. see you soon.

PLUG: {{{{{{{{{{

no real name given, known as "zaxo"

but here is the person's flickr

this person's got a shit more good stuff so check out his flickr!!!!


sean to me
me to sean


sean to me
me to sean


sean to me
me to sean


sean to me
me to sean


sean to me
me to sean


sean to me
me to sean